Stock Market Entertainment

sriranga

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K.Haputantri · **402** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Dec 03, 2012 7:54 am

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Thanks Shri.

sriranga · **403** Why student fails in Exam? Sat Dec 08, 2012 12:27 am

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K.Haputantri · **404** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Dec 08, 2012 7:55 am

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Its a nice one. Thanks Shri.

SL.Market · **405** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Dec 19, 2012 12:52 pm

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SL.Market · **406** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Dec 21, 2012 11:10 am

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SL.Market · **407** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Dec 24, 2012 1:20 pm

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SL.Market · **408** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Dec 26, 2012 11:10 am

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SL.Market · **409** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 01, 2013 11:39 am

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SL.Market · **410** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 04, 2013 2:56 pm

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No:323
The first rule of investing is not to lose money. The second rule is not to forget the fist rule!

The market is weird. Every time one guy sells, another one buys, and they both think they're smart.

Sometimes your best investments are the ones you don't make.

Profit is only made after all your positions are closed

Money is always there, but the pockets change.

Stock Split: When your ex-wife and her lawyer split all your assets equally between themselves.

Bull Market is a random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

Bear Market is a 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry and the husband gets no sex.

The safest way to double your money is to fold it and put it in your pocket.

Always play with other people's money!

SL.Market · **411** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Jan 07, 2013 1:56 pm

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No:324

Today's Stock Market Report

Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remain unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. Caterpillar stock inched up a bit. Sun peaked at midday. Balloon prices were inflated. And Scott Tissue touched a new bottom. And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market...

SL.Market · **412** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Jan 09, 2013 10:37 am

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No:325

Two economists are walking down the street. One sees a dollar lying on the sidewalk, and says so. "Obviously not," says the other. "If there were, someone would have picked it up!"

The First Law of Technical Analysis: For every analysis, there exists an equal and opposite analysis. The Second Law of Technical Analysis: They're both wrong!

SL.Market · **413** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:27 pm

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No:326
[b]
A man doing market research knocked on a door and was greeted by
a young woman with three small children running around at her feet.
He said, "I'm doing some research for Vaseline.
Have you ever used the product?"
She said, "Yes. My husband and I use it all the time."
"And if you don't mind me asking, what do you use it for?"
"We use it for sex." The researcher was a little taken aback.
He said, "Usually people lie to me and say that they use it on a child's
bicycle chain or to help with a gate hinge.
But, in fact, I know that most people do use it for sex. I admire you
for your honesty.
Since you've been frank so far, can you tell me exactly how you use it
for sex?"
The woman said, "I don't mind telling you at all.
My husband and I put it on the door knob and it keeps the kids out."

SL.Market · **414** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Jan 19, 2013 10:12 am

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No:327

sriranga · **415** The value of knowledge Fri Jan 25, 2013 5:53 pm

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A giant ship engine failed. The ship’s owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine.

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a young.

He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship’s owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do.

After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something.

Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for ten thousand dollars.

“What?!” the owners exclaimed. “He hardly did anything!”

So they wrote the old man a note saying, “Please send us an itemized bill.”

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer…… …… ……… $ 2.00
Knowing where to tap……… …… ……… $ 9,998.00

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort makes all the difference! Keep studying hard. Don’t give up!
Source: http://academictips.org

SL.Market · **416** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 29, 2013 10:24 am

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No:329

Go to the site...

http://www.peteranswers.com

In the first line write the dot(.) and then write the answer you want for the question in the second line then again write dot and continue if you want to have " Peter please answer"

In the second line write the question... press ok

enjoy

K.Haputantri · **417** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 29, 2013 10:46 am

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Thanks.

SL.Market · **418** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Thu Jan 31, 2013 3:05 pm

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Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 Theory10

sriranga · **419** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Feb 04, 2013 4:28 am

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SL.Market · **420** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Feb 06, 2013 3:29 pm

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Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 Good_a10

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sriranga · **421** MONEY-TIME-FUTURE-GOD Sat Feb 09, 2013 10:10 pm

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Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 Money10

Source: http://www.mindjunker.com

Hanoifortune · **422** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sun Feb 10, 2013 8:59 am

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y3H03BhVe8E

Girl Says 'Fuck You' To Judge!! Sentences Florida Teen To 30 Days In Jail For Cursing At Him

SL.Market · **423** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Feb 15, 2013 12:09 pm

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My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,
"There was water in the carburetor."
I asked her, "Where's the car?"
She replied, "In the lake."
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You
know, I was a fool when I married you."
The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than
to let him keep her.
I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to
interrupt her.
My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.
So I got myself two girlfriends.
A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided
not to report it since the thief was spending much less than his wife did.
Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does
it cost to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of
Africa, a Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real
happiness was until I got married; then it was too late.

A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" asked the friend.
"A billionaire." she replied.
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
It's not true that married men live longer than single men.
It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case,
it was almost impossible.
Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go
through life Thinking they had no faults at all.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask for whatever he wants,
but his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets.
The man thinks for a moment and says, Okay, give me a
million dollars and beat me till I'm half dead."
Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is
to forget it once.

SL.Market · **424** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Feb 20, 2013 2:30 pm

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No:336

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 Kawya10

SL.Market · **425** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Feb 27, 2013 7:03 pm

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No:337
Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.
If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough.
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

Albert Einstein

SL.Market · **426** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Mar 01, 2013 4:45 pm

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No:338

How to recognize whether your PC is female or male?
Is your computer “male” or “female”?

1. Open Notepad

2. Type the following line in notepad:

CreateObject("SAPI.SpVoice").Speak"I love you"

3. Save file as computer_gender.vbs

4. Run the file. . .

If you hear a male voice, your pc is a boy ...
If you hear a female voice, your pc is a girl ...

D.G.Dayaratne · **427** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Mar 01, 2013 4:59 pm

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Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 Pdf

Marana_Danweemak_.pdf
140K View Download

SL.Market · **428** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Mar 02, 2013 2:52 pm

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No:340

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 17 55510

SL.Market · **429** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Mar 04, 2013 9:00 am

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SL.Market · **430** Re: Stock Market Entertainment Wed Mar 13, 2013 2:56 pm

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No:342

Classic Exercises on Lateral Thinking

Questions :

1).There is a man who lives on the top floor of a very tall building. Everyday he gets the elevator down to the ground floor to leave the building to go to work. Upon returning from work though, he can only travel half way up in the lift and has to walk the rest of the way unless it's raining! Why?

2).A man and his son are in a car accident. The father dies on the scene, but the child is rushed to the hospital. When he arrives the surgeon says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son!" How can this be?

3).A man is wearing black. Black shoes, socks, trousers, coat, gloves and ski mask. He is walking down a back street with all the street lamps off. A black car is coming towards him with its light off but somehow manages to stop in time. How did the driver see the man?

Solutions :

1). The man is very, very short and can only reach halfway up the elevator buttons. However, if it is raining then he will have his umbrella with him and can press the higher buttons with it.
2). The surgeon was his mother.
3). It was day time.

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