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Stock Market Entertainment

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126Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Wife treats husband Sat Jan 07, 2012 2:21 am

sriranga


Co-Admin

A Wife Treats Hubby By Taking
Him To A Lap Dance Club For His Birthday ..

At The Club:
Doorman Says: Hi Jim How R You?

Wife Asks: How Does He Know You?
Jim Says: Oh Dear, I Play Football With Him

Inside Barman Says: The Usual Jim ?
Jim Says To Wife: Before You Say Anything , He's On The Darts Team In My Local

Next A Lap Dancer Says: Hi Jim Do You Crave Special Again ?

The Wife Storms Out Dragging Jim With Her & Jumps Into A Taxi..

Driver Says "Hey Jimmy Boy , You Picked Up An Ugly One This Time.."

Jim's Funeral Is On Sunday

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

127Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Jan 07, 2012 2:00 pm

kaka


Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics
Assistant Vice President - Equity Analytics

sriranga wrote:A Wife Treats Hubby By Taking
Him To A Lap Dance Club For His Birthday ..

At The Club:
Doorman Says: Hi Jim How R You?

Wife Asks: How Does He Know You?
Jim Says: Oh Dear, I Play Football With Him

Inside Barman Says: The Usual Jim ?
Jim Says To Wife: Before You Say Anything , He's On The Darts Team In My Local

Next A Lap Dancer Says: Hi Jim Do You Crave Special Again ?

The Wife Storms Out Dragging Jim With Her & Jumps Into A Taxi..

Driver Says "Hey Jimmy Boy , You Picked Up An Ugly One This Time.."

Jim's Funeral Is On Sunday

lol! good one

128Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Jan 09, 2012 3:09 pm

Academic


Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics

This is a little old, still worth sharing!

129Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Jan 09, 2012 4:26 pm

investor.sl


Senior Equity Analytic
Senior Equity Analytic

sriranga wrote:One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company.

He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?" the youth answered "none".

The director asked, " Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner. The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect.

The director asked, " Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?" The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me.

The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.*

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid.

The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office.

The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: " Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'

The Director asked, " please tell me your feelings."

The youth said, Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship.

The director said, " This is what I am looking for to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put himself first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?*

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.


good one

130Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty The A - Z Stress Management Mon Jan 09, 2012 6:48 pm

sriranga


Co-Admin

FRIENDS, LET US FOLLOW THIS ALPHABET ON “STRESS MANAGEMENT” TO HAVE A LESS STRESSFUL AND MORE ENJOYABLE LIFE.

* Always take time for yourself, at least 30 minutes per day.

* Be aware of your own stress meter: Know when to step back and cool down.

* Concentrate on controlling your own situation, without controlling everybody else.

* Daily exercise will burn off the stress chemicals.

* Eat lots of fresh fruit, veggies, bread and water, give your body the best for it to perform at its best.

* Forgive others, don't hold grudges and be tolerant -- not everyone is as capable as you..

* Gain perspective on things, how important is the issue?

* Hugs, kisses and laughter: Have fun and don't be afraid to share your feelings with others.

* Identify stressors and plan to deal with them better next time..

* Judge your own performance realistically; don't set goals out of your own reach.

* Keep a positive attitude, your outlook will influence outcomes and the way others treat you.

* Limit alcohol, drugs and other stimulants, they affect your perception and behaviour...

* Manage money well, seek advice and save at least 10 per cent of what you earn.

* No is a word you need to learn to use without feeling guilty.

* Outdoor activities by yourself, or with friends and family, can be a great way to relax....

* Play your favourite music rather than watching television.

* Quit smoking: It is stressing your body daily, not to mention killing you too.

* Relationships: Nurture and enjoy them, learn to listen more and talk less.....

* Sleep well, with a firm mattress and a supportive pillow; don't overheat yourself and allow plenty of ventilation.

* Treat yourself once a week with a massage, dinner out, the movies: Moderation is the key.

* Understand things from the other person's point of view......

* Verify information from the source before exploding.

* Worry less, it really does not get things completed better or quicker.

* Xpress: Make a regular retreat to your favourite space, make holidays part of your yearly plan and budget.......

* Yearly goal setting: Plan what you want to achieve based on your priorities in your career, relationships, etc.

* Zest for life: Each day is a gift, smile and be thankful that you are a part of the bigger picture........

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

131Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Just to forget the market day Mon Jan 09, 2012 7:00 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

*SINGH & THE INTERVIEWER*
Interviewer: 'What is your birth date?'
Singh : '13th October.'
Interviewer : 'Which year?'
Singh : 'Every year.'

*SINGH & HIS MANAGER*
The Manager asked Singh at an interview... .
'Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?'
Singh replied: 'P-O-S-T-B-O- X.'

*SINGH & LONDON TRIP*
After returning from a foreign trip, Singh asked his wife, 'Do I look like a foreigner?'
Wife: 'No! Why?'
Singh : 'In London , a lady asked me, 'Are you a foreigner?'. . that's why.'
Wife : ?????????

*SINGH & TOURIST*
A tourist from U.S.A. asked Singh whether any great man was born in his village...
Singh said , 'No sir, only babies were born here.'

*SINGH & DRIVER*
When Singh was travelling with his wife in a motorised tricycle, the driver adjusted the mirror.
Singh shouted, 'You are trying to see my wife, eh? Sit in the back. I will drive.'

*SINGH GOES TO HOTEL*
Singh went into a hotel. To wash his hands, he went to the washbasin.
Then when he had finished, he started washing the basin.
Seeing this, the manager asked what was he doing.
Singh pointed towards the signboard

'* WASH BASIN * '

*SINGH & INTERVIEWER - FINAL PART*
Interviewer : 'Just imagine you're in the 20th floor of a building and it's on fire. How will you escape?'
Singh: 'It's simple.. I will just stop my imagination. '

*Oh... Lastly.... I forgot ............ the funniest.... *

At a political rally, Singh was arrested. Why????????? ???
Because a lady journalist with a badge which read '*PRESS*' pinned on the right part of her blouse walked past him... and he did it!

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

132Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Jan 09, 2012 7:04 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

No:102

After shopping for most of the day, a couple returns to find their car has been stolen. They go to the police station to make a full report. Then, a detective drives them back to the parking lot to see if any evidence can be found at the scene of the crime. To their amazement, the car has been returned.

There is an envelope on the windshield with a note of apology and two tickets to a music concert. The note reads, 'I apologize for taking your car, but my wife was having a baby and I had to hot-wire your ignition to rush her to the hospital. Please forgive the inconvenience. Here are two tickets for tonight's concert of Garth Brooks, the country-and-western music star.'

Their faith in humanity restored, the couple attend the concert and return home late. They find their house has been robbed. Valuable goods have been taken from thoughout the house, from basement to attic. And, there is a note on the door reading, "Well, you still have your car. I have to put my newly born kid through college somehow, don't I?"

133Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty How to keep a woman happy.... Tue Jan 10, 2012 8:31 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A decorator
13. A stylist
14. A sexologist
15. A gynecologist
16. A psychologist
17. A pest exterminator
18. A psychiatrist
19. A healer
20. A good listener
21. An organizer
22. A good father
23. Very clean
24. Sympathetic
25. Athletic
26. Warm
27. Attentive
28. Gallant
29. Intelligent
30. Funny
31. Creative
32. Tender
33. Strong
34. Understanding
35. Tolerant
36. Prudent
37. Ambitious
38. Capable
39. Courageous
40. Determined
41. True
42. Dependable
43. Passionate
44. Compassionate


WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:


45. Give her compliments regularly
46. Love shopping
47. Be honest
48. Be very rich
49. Not stress her out
50. Not look at other girls


AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes


IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes





HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY






1. Leave him alone

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

134Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Old Dogs.................. Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:09 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

An old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep shit now!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly,

"Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...

"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"


Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!
Bull Shit and brilliance only come with age and experience.


http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

135Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 13, 2012 12:08 pm

ashoka1966

ashoka1966
Senior Equity Analytic
Senior Equity Analytic

කලම්බෝ සය්මන්ගේ එක්කෙනාගේ (CSE ) හෙවත් සොපි ගේ කතාව.

ඔය මහත්තයටවත් පුලුවන්නම් කියන්න මොකක්ද මේකට කරන්න පුළුවන් ...කියලා.
මට නම් දැන් එපාවෙලා මේක නගින්නේ නැති එක ගැන හිතල.
අපේ එක්කෙනා නම් කියන්නේ තව ටිකක් ඉවසන්න මේක නගින කම් කියල.
පහුගිය කාලෙ එක නෝනා කෙනෙකුත් මේක නග්ගන්න හැදුව කියල අපේ එක්කෙනා කිව්වා.
හැබැය් ඒකතාවට නම් මට තරහත් ගියා.මොනතරම් නොසන්ඩාල කතාවක්ද ඒක....
ඒ නෝනටත් ඉතින් මේක නම් නග්ගන්න බැරිවෙලා අල්ලලා දාල ගෙදර ගිහිල්ලලු.
දැන් වෙන මොකක් හරි නග්ගන්න බලනවා ඇති.
අර බඩ මහත රැවුල වවපු මහත්තයටත් නග්ග ගන්න බැරිවුනලු.
ඒකතාවට නම් මට දුකත් හිතුන.
දැන් අවුරුද්දකටත් වැඩි කාලයක් මේක බැහැපු ගමන් තමා.
මොනවා කරන්නද මමත් ඔහේ බලන් ඉන්නවා.අපේ එක්කෙනත් බලාගත්තු අත බලාගෙන කල්පනා කරකර ඉන්නවා .
දැන් ඔන්න අපේ එක්කෙනා තවත් අලුත් කතාවක් කියාගෙන එනවා.
අර මොකක්ද ඒක ලිහිල් කලාමද බුරුල් කලාමද කොහෙද මේක නගින්න පටන් ගනිවිලු.
නැග්ග ගමන්ම ගිය අවුරුද්දටම හරියන්න එක්ක ......................................
අනේ මන්දන්නේ නැහැ ඕව ......මට ඕවට හිනා තමා.......

136Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Mon Jan 16, 2012 12:47 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

A girl and guy were speeding over 100 mph on the road on a motorcycle...

Girl: Slow down. Im scared.

Guy: No this is fun.

Girl: No its not. Please, its too scary!

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!

Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.

Girl hugs him

Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on yourself? Its bugging me.

In the paper the next day Sad A motorcycle had crashed into a building because
of brake failure. Two people were on it, but only one had survived.

The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his brakes
broke, but he didn't want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she
loved him & felt her hug him one last time, then had her wear his helmet so that
she would live even though it meant that he would die.


If there is anyone in life you love this much, please send this. Forward this
to all your good friends on-line to show them that you care.

NOW, make a wish about somthing you would like to happen with you and someone
whom you REALLY care about..........

137Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty This is true for CSE...? Mon Jan 16, 2012 2:51 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

A=1, B=2, C=3, D=4, E=5, F=6,......,X=24, Y=25, Z=26

knowledge=11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5=96

Hardwork=8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11=98


Attitude=1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5=100

138Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty HOTEL BILL... Mon Jan 16, 2012 6:12 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

An elderly lady decided to give herself a big treat for her significant birthday by staying overnight in one of London's most expensive hotels.

When she checked out next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for £250.00.

She exploded and demanded to know why the charge was so high. "It's a nice hotel but the rooms certainly aren't worth £250.00 for just an overnight stop without even breakfast."

The clerk told her that £250.00 is the 'standard rate' so she insisted on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appeared and forewarned by the desk clerk announced: "the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre which are available for use."

"But I didn't use them," she said.

"Well, they r here, and u could have," explained the Manager.

He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from Edinburgh, Glasgow, and Aberdeen performing here," the Manager said.


"But I didn't go to any of those shows," she said.

"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replied.

No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!"

The Manager was unmoved, so she decided to pay, wrote a cheque and gave it to the Manager.

The Manager was surprised when he looked at the cheque. "But madam, this cheque is only made out for £50.00." '

"That's correct. I charged you £200.00 for sleeping with me," she replied.

"But I didn't!" exclaims the very surprised Manager.

"Well, too bad, I was here, and u could have."

Don't mess with Senior Citizens

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

139Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 17, 2012 2:30 pm

sas

sas
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Stock11

140Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 17, 2012 3:02 pm

bakapandithaya

bakapandithaya
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

sas wrote:Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Stock11

Xactly pic talking abt 2day mkt. thnkx

141Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty SENIOR CITIZEN DRIVER Thu Jan 19, 2012 1:54 am

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

A senior citizen drove his brand new convertible out of the
showroom. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph,
enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.

"Amazing," he thought as he flew along the road, pushing the pedal even harder.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a police car behind him,
lights flashing and siren blaring.

He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought,
"What am I doing? I'm too old for this shit," and pulled over to await
the copper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the copper walked up to the convertable, looked
at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is
Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never
heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused and said, "Years ago, my wife ran off
with a traffic cop. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good weekend, sir," replied the copper.

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

142Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Thu Jan 19, 2012 5:07 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

No:112

One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can't do it because he's her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, "Mom... What have you been doing all your life? Dad's been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can't marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!!!"

Her mom replies, "Don't worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn't really your dad."

143Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Thu Jan 19, 2012 5:12 pm

K.Haputantri

K.Haputantri
Co-Admin

Thanks guys.

144Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Thu Jan 19, 2012 9:52 pm

sas

sas
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics

145Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty The Wheels of Life Fri Jan 20, 2012 2:57 am

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Att40910

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

146Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Unmarried girl‏ Sat Jan 21, 2012 7:10 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

A young unmarried girl discovers that she is pregnant.

Scared..She confides this 'news' to her mother.

Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did This to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call.

Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature And distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the Girl, and tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the Problem. However, I can't marry her because of my personal family Situation, but I'll take responsibility.

If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach villa and a $1,000,000 bank account.

If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $2,000,000 bank account.

If it is twins, a factory and $1,000,000 each.

However, If there is a miscarriage or unsuccessful delivery, what do you suggest I do?"

At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him,

"You can try again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

147Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 24, 2012 3:56 pm

sas

sas
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics
Senior Manager - Equity Analytics

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Inject10
Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Moti11

148Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 24, 2012 3:58 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

sas wrote:Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Inject10
Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Moti11

Timely Reminder.
Thanks.

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

149Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 24, 2012 7:04 pm

bakapandithaya

bakapandithaya
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

sriranga wrote:
sas wrote:Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Inject10
Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Moti11

Timely Reminder.
Thanks.

lol good 1 thnkx 4shring

150Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 27, 2012 3:56 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

No:117


Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 1zcpyxw

151Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 27, 2012 4:25 pm

K.Haputantri

K.Haputantri
Co-Admin

Thanks guys.

152Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Fri Jan 27, 2012 6:32 pm

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

An old woman came into her doctor's office and confessed to an embarrassing problem. "I do that all the time, Doctor Johnson, but they're soundless, and they have no odor. In fact, since I've been here, I did it no less than twenty times. What can I do?"

"Here's a prescription, Mrs. Harris. Take these pills three times a day for seven days and come back and see me in a week."

Next week an upset Mrs. Harris marched into Dr. Johnson's office. "Doctor, I don't know what was in those pills, but the problem is worse! I'm doing it just as much, but now it smells terrible! What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Calm down, Mrs. Harris," said the doctor soothingly. "Now that we've fixed your sinuses, we'll work on your hearing!!!"

153Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Jan 28, 2012 8:19 am

SL.Market

SL.Market
Vice President - Equity Analytics
Vice President - Equity Analytics

No:119

There are primarily 3 different types of investors who post on the message boards.
1. Those who don't know anything: approx. 10%
2. Those who know a little: approx. 10%
3. Those who don't realize they don't know anything: approx. 80%
...........................................................................................................................


These two women were walking through the forest when they hear this voice from under a log. Investigating, the women discovered the voice was coming from a frog:
"Help me, ladies! I am an investment banker who, through an evil witch's curse, has been transformed into a frog. If one of you will kiss me, I'll be returned to my former state!"
The first woman took out her purse, grabbed the frog, and stuffed it inside her handbag. The second woman, aghast, screamed, "Didn't you hear him? If you kiss him, he'll turn into an investment banker?" The second woman replied, "Sure, but these days a talking frog is worth more than an investment banker!"
.......................................................................................................................

154Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Sat Jan 28, 2012 10:51 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Captur21

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

155Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Empty Re: Stock Market Entertainment Tue Jan 31, 2012 5:46 pm

sriranga

sriranga
Co-Admin

Stock Market Entertainment - Page 6 Less10

http://sharemarket-srilanka.blogspot.co.uk/

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